Truth bomb! – If you’re not happy with your life, if you are anxious or depressed you’re not listening to your heart, you’re listening to your brain and your ego.
We are all taught when we’re young to have goals and that achieving those goals will bring us something that our ego wants – the amazing feeling of accomplishment. The pride that you, yes YOU, did it! You went out and did something that others could not and accomplished your goal.
Some of these goals as well as their rewards, can come in the form of expensive items we get brainwashed into believing that once we purchase them, we are better than those who don’t have them. This information comes from a variety of different avenues including TV, magazines, social media and our peers. For women, it may be a $2,500 Louis Vuitton bag that is the “IT” bag, and we equate owning it with having more wealth.
For others, it can be a brand new BMW or other expensive cars that not just “anyone” can own due to the high cost of the car. A car now turns into a status symbol of excellence elevating you above others.
The more important questions are:
Do these things make you happy? And
What will it take out of you to obtain that status symbol? I.e. how many hours will you need to work and be away from your family to make this a reality?
Most people define success as having X amount of money in the bank, driving a nice car and having the things they want in their lives. There is, however, always a trade-off when purchasing those luxury items. You will be working more hours at your job. You may be travelling to visit clients which will take time away from your family. Everything that you desire has a trade off in terms of money, time and effort that needs to be put in to purchase that amazing “it” item you’ve always dreamt of.
Disclaimer: It’s ok to want nice things and please don’t beat yourself up for wanting to better yourself or drive a nice car. Everyone loves a new car and the prestige that comes with it. The problem becomes clear when you become a SLAVE to what you desire and are willing to put your family and morals second, and almost kill yourself to have that shiny new object.
The question then becomes: How can we be happy with what we have now? Below are 5 ways to be happy now.
BE GRATEFUL – I touched on this in a recent post and being grateful for what you have right now is CRUCIAL to your happiness in the now as well as your future success. Here’s why – when you are grateful, you raise your vibration which allows the Universe to bring you more of the good stuff. The Universe always matches your vibration. If your vibration is low and you are thinking about how much you DON’T have, the Universe matches that vibe and brings you more of what you don’t want or need.
If you have a home or condo that suits your needs and is a place for the family to grow, be grateful. If you have a car that gets you to work and is dependable, be grateful. The more you can recognize what you DO have instead of concentrating on what you don’t have, the better off you are.
BEING HEALTHY COUNTS – Many posts discuss the purchases you can make to keep your ego satisfied. People are starting to realize that true happiness encompasses both your spirituality and your health even more than material things. Being healthy is something so many of us take for granted but remember, if there is someone around you who is not healthy, it’s a really big deal.
Being healthy means that you or a loved one can still use their body and it will do all that you ask it too. Walking, driving, talking and even working out means that the body is in good shape and that is a true gift. Tomorrow is not guaranteed, be grateful for you and your family’s health.
YOUR GIFTS – What special gifts do you possess that make you unique? Do you talk with and understand what animals say? Are you awesome at working with finances and numbers are your jam? A gift is described as “a natural ability or talent” which means something that you can do extremely well without training. Most of the time, you were born with this talent and you have access to it anytime you wish.
Are you thankful for that gift? Are you using that gift? If you answered no to either or both of those questions, try to picture someone who doesn’t have your particular gift. For example, if you can draw easily and produce exquisite art, think about someone who can only draw stick figures. When you think about it in that context, it shows you how much of an advantage you have. No matter what your gift is, be thankful for it and find a way to start using your spectacular gifts to help others.
HAVE AN ABUNDANT MINDSET – Many of us were brought up believing there is never enough (money, time, health, happiness, abundance etc.) and that puts us in a lack mentality. I’m sure you have heard or said some of these phrases:
No matter how much money you make, there is never enough to go around
I can’t do this, I can’t handle this
I don’t have enough money to… I should do this...
I/You have no choice, I/You have to…
You have to work hard to get what you want and even then you may not get it
I don’t have enough time to… I worry… I’m sorry…
All of the phrases above come from a lack mindset that focuses on the problem and not the solution. If you are unconsciously saying “I can’t, I shouldn’t, there isn’t enough X so therefore I can’t”, you are lowering your vibration and drowning in a lack mentality.
It’s not your fault because you were taught to think and say these things from an early age. You may not even realize what you are saying, but if those thoughts are going around in your head in a constant loop, the image of lack is what you are projecting and reinforcing in your brain. That is the message you are sending out into the World.
Your challenge is to stop saying these phrases and begin to talk about abundance. Here are some phrases that will help you on your journey:
There is always enough for me. There is more than enough money to go around.
It won’t take long to be successful.
I have more than enough money, happiness, time, in my life. I am thriving and the sky is the limit.
An abundant mindset means that no matter what you are doing or thinking, there is more than enough for you to be happy.
STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS – It has often been said that “Comparison is the thief of Joy”, and that may be the case if you are constantly comparing what you have to what others have. Have you ever known someone who drives a Lamborghini and thought “I should have a car like that, I deserve it” and your mind begins to try and find ways for you to obtain that car.
This type of mental driver can turn swiftly from something positive to negative when you become obsessed with the thing, the car in this case, and you feel as though you aren’t as good as the person who already has that thing.
This is also known as “Keeping up with the Jones’s”. Instead of concentrating all your efforts on getting that flashy car, ask yourself these questions:
Will obtaining that car truly make me happy? Is this the car that I really want? Will it fit my lifestyle or is it something exotic and beyond my financial means? Do I want this car because it fits my personality or do I want it because Jane Doe has it?
HERE IS THE SECRET TO HAPPINESS: If you can live your life based on what YOU desire and what YOU want to contribute, and not be consumed with what others are doing and purchasing, you will be a much happier person.
Go your own way and do what makes you happy. Don’t compare yourself to others and know that you are good enough just the way you are with exactly what you have now. How you dress, what you drive and where you live don’t define you and certainly don’t equal the sum of all that you have to offer.
What you own in this moment, along with your many talents and gifts is more than enough. Be happy with who you are, just as you are. Striving to be a better person and desiring nice things is great, just let it happen organically instead of thinking this is a race and I must keep up with everyone else.
You are enough!